This morning I am happy to be able to post an entry written by James of www.whatisthis.com as part of the BlogSwap. James discusses a tough truth that he and his wife discovered through a time of great pain.
My Tough Truth: God’s Never Failing Love
It was in early 1999 that I begin this entry. This is a tough truth that I do not like to reflect upon, but rather have come to embrace it as a testimony of God’s love.
You see, I and my wife Amy separated during the year of 1999. Subsequently, I filed for divorce during this time period. At this point and time we had been married for 9 years with a 3 year old boy. Little did I know how this would end…
Our marriage seemingly was rock solid. I was a self-employed web designer, city councilman, active in church and youth ministry, and a charter vice-president of a chamber of commerce I essentially put together in the small town we lived in. Amy was also active in church and took care of our son.
Then it happened. The glass bubble we lived in broke into pieces. I shattered my family’s life as we knew it. I left the family to pursue my own selfish interests. Among the emotional fallout our associate pastor attempted to reason with me through a couple of meetings and for a short time I and Amy reconciled, only to split up again. During this time I fell deeper and deeper in this “void” of denial about what I was doing. I began to question so many things about what I was doing and why. All the while, Amy and Daniel continued to suffer. I asked God simple questions, “Why are you doing this to me? Why are you allowing this to happen to me? If you love me so much, why? Why, why why?”
Almost 1 year would pass before I fully realized what had occurred. “Me, myself and I” was the problem. I came to the point where I acknowledged before God that HE is in control, and that I am not. I asked forgiveness from God that day. I prayed that I would accept any and all consequences that would come my way. I prayed that God would work in a way to restore my life… my marriage.. my relationship with my young son.. to help me correct the mistakes that I had made over the past year of separation from my wife, friends and relatives. I asked God to love me again.
And He answered me. “My son, I have always loved you…even when you thought I didn’t. I have never left your side. I was always there though you chose to turn away from me. Keep me first in your life and I will bless you more than you know. I love you James, don’t forget that…don’t forget me.”
From that day forward God has moved in a miraculous way. I have humbled myself before my Lord and He has blessed me, restored my marriage stronger than it ever has been. Restored and strengthened my relationship with my son; restored my relationships with relatives and friends. Most of all, God has reminded me of His ultimate love that He has for me; His unfailing love.
I live for Christ now rather than “just living” and can say without hesitation, “I love you Lord and I lift my voice..to worship you..oh my soul..rejoice…take joy my king..in what you hear..may it be a sweet..sweet sound..in your ear”
I am a living testimony that marriages can survive Satan’s attacks. I am a living testimony of God’s love for me and those around me. I learned a tough truth, though a truth that is so awesome in itself.
God’s love never fails.
Check out my blog at www.whatisthis.com.
You can view my BlogSwap entry at Ochuk’s Blog.
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