Skip to content ↓

31 Days of Wisdom – Day 19

This is part nineteen in my 31-day study through the book of Proverbs. The purpose of this study is to learn what God has to say in this book about wisdom and discernment. Yesterday I continued to learn one of the predominant themes of this book – I need to guard my lips and choose my words carefully, whether I am in a position of judgment or simply listening in order to give advice. Also, I am to put my trust in the Lord and find my refuge in Him rather than in material possessions.

One emphasis in chapter nineteen is family relationships. Verse 13 reads “A foolish son is the ruin of his father, And the contentions of a wife are a continual dripping.” A son who despises wisdom will bring grief to his family. Perhaps the most obvious Biblical example of this is Jesus’ later parable about the prodigal son. At a young age the foolish son demanded his share of the inheritance, left his family, and squandered all he had in wild, godless living. His actions caused his father untold grief.

Where a son brings his father to ruin, a wife who nags unceasingly is like a continual dripping. There are few things more annoying than the constant drip, drip, drip of water and the author uses this as an illustration to emphasize how he feels about nagging.

The purpose of these proverbs is not as much to make a statement about the son and wife as it is to show that family relationships cause greater joy or pain than distant relationships. There is much greater potential for me to be hurt (or blessed) by those who are close to me.

Continuing with the family theme, verse 14 reads “Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, But a prudent wife is from the LORD.” Though I may inherit wealth and all sorts of material possessions from my father, a good wife is a gift from God. A wise, godly wife is a precious gift and one I ought to be thankful for every day. How much more valuable is a gift from God than an earthly inheritance!

“He who mistreats his father and chases away his mother Is a son who causes shame and brings reproach.” Defying the fifth commandment, which instructs me to honor my parents, will bring me shame and reproach. I am to honor my parents throughout my life, being willing to sacrifice for them as they did for me. This proverb stands in stark contrast to the way parents are regarded in our society and helps me remember to honor God’s will rather than society’s.

Verse 27 serves as a reminder of the importance of heeding the wisdom in these proverbs. “Cease listening to instruction, my son, And you will stray from the words of knowledge.” I need to heed God’s wisdom which is displayed throughout this book. If I do not, I will be leading myself away from the way of wisdom and down the road that leads to destruction.

Not all the proverbs in this chapter have to do with family. The third verse says “The foolishness of a man twists his way, And his heart frets against the LORD.” A man’s own foolishness “twists his way.” He ends up turning himself around and heading in the wrong direction. When he does this, how does he react? He frets against God! He brings sin upon himself and then blames God for it. I can certainly testify to having done this in my life and I scarcely think there is a believer in the world who has not done this at one time or another. How the human heart hates God that we would blame him for our own misfortune!

“Wealth makes many friends, But the poor is separated from his friend.” This is an interesting proverb for it states a fact without any moral judgment. Though our hearts recoil at the thought that those with wealth attract friends while the poor do not, it is an undeniable fact. The author simply points out this fact, leaving it for our meditation, rather than commenting on it.

“He who has pity on the poor lends to the LORD, And He will pay back what he has given.” This verse stresses what a privilege it is to be able to use my wealth to serve the Lord. When I use what God has given me to help those in need, it is like I am lending it directly to Him. God rewards me for this, though it does not say whether the reward is here or on earth. We know from elsewhere in Scripture that the reward is both temporal and eternal. I am rewarded on earth by the knowledge that as I use my wealth wisely God will continue to provide for my needs. At the same time, as I give away treasures on earth I am storing up treasures in heaven.

I will end today with the eighteenth verse. “Chasten your son while there is hope, And do not set your heart on his destruction.” This harkens back to what I learned several days ago. To hold back the discipline that my son deserves is to hate him. I need to discipline him wisely, justly and immediately, lest I wait too long and find that it is too late. Eventually an undisciplined son will go beyond the point of no return and I will have lost him. When I refuse to discipline him, I show contempt for his soul, for I am sending him down the path of foolishness rather than training him to walk the path of wisdom.


  • Will You Be a Pillar?

    How do we lead in a culture shaped by performance, individualism, and platform? Platforms to Pillars by cultural commentator Mark Sayers offers a biblical alternative to the platform mentality that dominates our society. Drawing from the ancient world, Sayers challenges Christians to become pillars—people who provide strength and support for others, who live with character…

  • The Tallest Trees

    The Winds Blow Hardest Against the Tallest Trees

    Through the weekend had many questions about Christian leaders who fall. And I expressed that just as the winds blow hardest against the tallest trees, so temptations may press hardest against the leaders who rise the highest. Just as floods press against shallow roots, so seductive desires rise up against those whose fall would bring…

  • A La Carte Collection cover image

    A La Carte (April 21)

    A La Carte: Toxic servant leadership / Taking our stress to the Lord / The problem with habits / Is it wrong for Christians to choose cremation? / Why does your church meet in a house? / Big book and Kindle deals / and more.

  • Expectations

    Why We Ask So Little of God

    Most Christians expect little from God, ask little, and therefore receive little, and are content with little. Though the Bible calls us to pray and though it promises that “the prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working,” we can still have very modest expectations of what God will accomplish through…

  • A La Carte Collection cover image

    Weekend A La Carte (April 19)

    A La Carte: Why man needs God / Why nails matter / Kids’ picture books / MLK’s famous letter changed a DC church / How to mentor / A tearless eternity / and more.

  • Free Stuff Fridays (TGBC)

    This weeks Free Stuff Friday is sponsored by The Good Book Company. They are giving away a bundle of their best-selling Good Book Guides that are designed to guide your head and your heart through God’s word. Each Good Book Guide includes a concise leader’s guide in the back.  The Bundle includes: Giveaway Rules: You…